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    當人生只剩下細節 《何以笙簫默》有感

    來源: 作者:舊夏 發布時間:2015-02-16

    《何以笙簫默》小說在線閱讀   顧漫作品集

      年少時關注所有暢銷書,所以除開郭敬明外,明曉溪也在選擇范圍內。

      當時明曉溪推薦顧漫的時候,大概是這么說的:

      顧漫碼字速度慢得像龜爬BLABLA但是寫文無論是文筆還是情節都無可挑剔BLABLABLA《何以笙簫默》多么的打動人心BLABLABLA……嗯,差不多是這樣。

      雖然對能被明曉溪評價為「文筆好的人」的文筆很持懷疑態度,但她把《何以》夸得像十年難得一遇的好書,多少還是引起了我的好奇。

      在這里先鋪墊一下,這本書我看了兩遍。

      再鋪墊一下,《何以》這本書被我所有高逼格(其實是傲嬌)的朋友們打到瑪麗蘇一列,一邊看新劇播出一邊吐槽劇情「根本不可能好不好!」,我混在他們中間,同樣也是一邊吐槽劇組硬拗智商的地方,但卻又一邊很想看下去。

      ——是源于對這部小說的喜愛嗎?

      嚴格來講,顧漫的文筆真的一般,只比明曉溪好那么些許。這本書情節籠統一算,也好像沒多么復雜,甚至沒多么地不落俗套。想看言情,女作家們寫得好又不俗的太多了。

      所以,當作一個文學作品來評判時,《何以》這本書,并沒有令人驚喜到足以去談「喜愛」的地步的。

      不出色。是我第一遍看完這本書時的直觀印象。

      大概兩三年之后,我又想起了這本書。很大程度上也是因為身為閱讀者的我,的個人狀態的改變。

      我從前看書毫無代入感,置身事外看故事和文筆,小說基本不看第二遍。

      不知從什么時候起,我開始需要書籍給我一些情感反饋,讓我去相信有些東西是存在在這個世界上的。

      這種感覺大概是和「信仰」一樣,出生時對世界無所畏懼,可越往后活越迷茫的時候,就會覺得人得信點什么,才能在這個世界上獲得力量,繼續熬下去。

      所以當時在看完的一遍的兩三年后,我總覺得何以琛那句「而我不想將就」在腦海里來回蕩漾。懷疑的時候要找給自己找理由去堅定信仰。大概懷抱這種初衷,我重新翻出這本書看了第二遍。

      第二遍和第一遍又何不同?

      直到第二遍看,我看見的才是人物感情而不是劇情。

      一個真的用情至深的人會怎么想、怎么做、怎么說話,我想顧漫給出了我們答案。

      錢包里除了錢只有她的證件照,背面是「My sunshine」。

      想要去美國找她,國內碰到她后第一時間取消了會簽。去美國單純就是為了去找她而已。

      找她要照片,卻嘴硬「提醒自己那段愚蠢的過去」。

      ……

      ——他記得她說過的話,記得由一個手寫的名字所引發的回憶碎片,記得他們初識的對白,記得自己因她而起的所有改變。

      我始終覺得,一個人愛著另外一個人時,愛到最深,也不過是記住關于那個人的一切了。

      我們每一個人其實并無特別,但能以這樣的方式活在一個人的心里,被一個人努力地想要去了解、去記住、去珍惜,實在是一件值得與「奇跡」相提并論的事。

      「愛情」 本身,就是發生在我們平凡人身上的小奇跡啊。

      而我對這本書的所有喜愛,也正是源于何以琛的所有「記得」。

      雖說重逢后的許多壓抑克制,冷言相向,死要面子嘴硬的程度不亞于《說謊》中唱的「角落那窗口,聞得到玫瑰花香,被你一說是有些印象」,但也感謝顧漫能將這份因深情而起的「別扭」寫得絲絲入扣,苦澀之余卻也逐漸讀懂何以琛曾經的絕望與堅定。

      我們因為愛情說謊,是否也是因為不想為愛情所傷?

      與愛情共存著的自尊心、驕傲、自我、安全感,都在提醒著我們,在我們知道即將失去愛情時,我們還要靠剩下的「它們」而活。

      因為我們不知道,什么時候會失去愛情啊。

      ——如果能不失去愛,就好了。

      這大抵,也是何以琛「認輸」的原因。

      對相愛過的人而言,人生說白了,剩下的不過是有關「他」或「她」的細節。

      經過許多年,時間改變,世事境遷,我們連「過去的自己」都無從證明是否存在,卻還有愛人心里,存活著當初那個完好的我們。

      如果無法「認輸」換得愛情回來,起碼對愛人的「記得」,永遠心存感激。

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